Because I have peed on everything else in the house. I have now taken 5 home pregnancy tests in 2.5 days. I have a problem. Still decisively positive. I just don't know what to think right now. I am worried about getting too excited before I know anything definitive, but when you are staring at 2 huge lines or the word pregnant, how can you not get excited? These are things my infertile eyes have never seen. Every time I take a test, it takes me a few minutes to process the information.
I think part of the problem is the fact that I am so used to being infertile. That has been my life since 2/26/07, the day I walked through my RE's doors for the first time. People have to be sensitive around me. People understand I might avoid events if they are going to bring their babies. People rarely email me pictures of their kids (with the exception of one...grrrr....). How are people going to treat me now? To be quite honest, I'm not exactly sure how to act or feel. I have thought about little else (well, that, and about decorating my home, which is finished now). I feel like David and I talk about infertility all the time. We talk about the current cycle we are in, how we plan to approach the next, and how "I'm having a really hard time lately."
I just hope I can get out of this slump and feel excited once I get a beta. Please. I am so sick of being the poor infertile girl.
2 weeks ago