Something happened tonight. Something that reminded me what it means to be a mom. We did our usual bedtime routine: dinner, play, baths for all three. I watched my three children splash around in the tub. Laugh, play. I watched their father, the love of my life, carefully shampoo Paige's hair, gently rinse it out. With ease, he made sure the boys were clean, head to toe. I helped lotion, diaper, and get jammies on three precious, happy, and now clean kids. Then I took Jack back to the bedroom to feed him.
He fell asleep while eating, in my arms. I picked him up and let him lay on my chest. I felt him breath, in and out. I started thinking - these are the days. Hot tears were pouring down my face. I asked God, why? Why does time have to go so fast? Why can't I stay here, in this moment, with a perfect sleeping baby on my chest, a husband and two more kids a room a way. I was angry with myself for previous nights, when doing the same routine, I got annoyed with my precious child for not falling asleep fast enough. I have dishes to clean, bills to pay, a playroom to pick up, and I'd like to watch some TV before bed.
But tonight, I soaked up this moment. This perfect moment. I studied his ears. They are so tiny on his big head and fluffy hair. I looked at his ten little fingers. Freshly clipped finger nails. And his sweet fat feet. The smell of a little boy, straight out of the bath tub. I breathed in every ounce of my perfect son. I was thankful that, just for a little bit, everything was right in my world.
Tonight, my prayer is this: God, please help me to remember to cherish these days, always.